Fear Fight

Thanks to Rita, Beto was raised on fear. Fear of God, fear of the switch, fear of white people. There was never time to imagine what he could be; he was too busy trying not to be detected. By the time Reynard married his mother, Beto was afraid of his own shadow. Reynard eagerly stepped into the role of stepfather wanting to do all the things he thought fathers did. He took Beto to sports games, on camping trips, and introduced him to his friends’ sons. But wherever Beto went, his tread was so careful that his timidity spooked the other children. The adults thought him strange too. To minimize the odds of enraging the powerful forces that shaped his life, Beto preferred to keep to himself. Avoiding the watchful eye of those he feared, he spent much of his youth hiding out in his room either with the shades pulled or inside the full darkness of his closet where he could not be seen. Rita didn’t seem to mind. She thought a healthy dose of fear would keep him safe.